Wednesday, January 30, 2008

An Open Letter to Citibank

Dear Citibank,

As I was leaving the building the other day, I noticed a sign on the door of the Citibank branch to the right of the escalator that read '"We are moving to a more convenient location in the building so that we may provide you with better service."

As much as I appreciate the thought, I found the assumption that I'd find the new location more convenient a bit presumptuous. I'd think that, at minimum, you'd have asked me first. I mean, I only work 17 floors up, and it would have taken you two minutes to drop in and pose the question.

My answer, of course, would have been 'no' as I found the existing location to be plenty convenient. In fact, the very sight of the branch as I left the office often spurred me to think things that ranged from "Hey, I need money. I should stop at the ATM" to "Hey. I'm going out for drinks tonight and I'm going to need money. I should stop at the ATM."

Now that you've moved the branch I'm going to have nothing to remind me of my dwindling cash reserves and when I go out drinking, I'll likely wind up having to ask my friends to pay.

Hold on a minute. Free drinks? Maybe the move really is for my convenience!

Thanks Citibank! And I'm sorry for doubting you.

Your Friend,

Joe

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Full disclosure: About 10 minutes after I wrote this I went downstairs and noticed that they'd simply moved the branch to the left side of the escalator bank. That's certainly not more convenient as I almost never look left upon stepping off of the escalator. Curse you Citibank!