Wednesday, November 19, 2008

An Open Letter to World of Warcraft Fans

Dear WoW Fans,

Let me begin by saying that I've never played this particular game, so it came as a surprise to me when I saw people lining up outside of Best Buy in freezing temperatures last week in anticipation of the release that evening of something called World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lych King. My curiosity was such that I began my workday with a few minutes of research to learn what the fuss was all about. I know this has many of you – or at least those if you who have been able to tear yourself away from the game long enough to read this – looking down at me for not possessing what is probably fairly common knowledge, but in my defense you should know that I possess almost no knowledge of anything.

The website was almost no help with its narrative that began with “It has been five years since the heir apparent to the throne of Lordaeron disappeared into the frozen wastes of Northrend...” and continued spouting some additional Lord-of-the-Rings-esque babble before concluding with “...Soon the world will learn what it means to incur the wrath of its one true king...” which I took to mean that Grant had hacked the site and revealed his intentions to the unsuspecting public.

But I digress. Further research revealed that WoW (as it’s known) is massively multiplayer online role-playing game (MMORPG) run by a company that charges the 11 million or so subscribers $14.95 per month to trek around it’s fake world. Add to that the cost of the game itself as well as the two add-on packs and, well, let’s just say that it makes my get rich quick scheme look foolish by comparison.

Anyway, I digress yet again. The point of this letter is not to tell you about a game that you've already undoubtedly squandered untold hours of your life playing, but to tell you about another MMRPG called “real-life” (RL). You’d love it. There are all kinds of evil to battle, billions of people to meet, and riches to be earned and spent however you see fit. The best part is that you don’t even need to buy expansion packs to experience more of it. And the level of detail is amazing – far better than anything you've seen before no matter how powerful your graphics card may be.

Once you leave the WoW and experience RL you’ll never go back. Instead of spending days in front of your computer, you’ll be…what’s that word again? Mobile. In fact, you may even find yourself wanting to share your experiences. You'll create a Facebook account and before you know it you'll have a vast on-line social network! You'll then start a blog to tell people all about the things you've done - and you'll meet tons of "virtual friends." Before you know if you'll be spending most of your time on-line trying to keep up with all of your new friends and....

Hold on, I think I see a flaw in my logic.

Never mind. Get back to your game.

Your Friend,

Joe